Well, the reality is, I’m at work and should be doing work-related things – especially on those items I’ve fallen behind on. But lately I’ve been thinking how much I miss writing on my blog and sharing with you the weirdness that is my life. I’ve also missed writing in general. Besides e-mails and the occasional proposal, about all I write out is a grocery list (although I do try to make those as creative as possible).
A few days ago, I was looking at an old e-mail account that I hadn’t opened up in years. I had a pen-pal relationship with a friend named Katrin from Romania who now has her own blog (linked here, but maybe closed down). The back and forth e-mails covered daily events to deeper, more meaningful things, but I was mostly struck by what a damn good writer she was and is. (Katrin, if you happen by my blog after all these months of dormancy, please start writing again!). Reading our exchanges made me want to write again and so here I am avoiding work and, as likely, missing out on making some money.
The blog idea started as a whim while I was enjoying my time immensely with The Boy in New Zealand. It was partially inspired by a friend John who gave me his theory that blogs such as this are the new town square for sharing ideas and perspectives. I was also pushed by Anna, a young campaign worker, who wrote a hell of a blog and made me think, Well, if she can do this, then certainly I can.
My blog inspired others to create their own and it was one of the things that made me most proud. On the other hand, as I took my sabbatical from the blog, most of my fellow bloggers began to fall off as I did. The Boy created his own and, strangely enough, quietly began to begin writing again last week, so I noticed. Sladed stopped his very entertaining blog and now writes more about triathlon training. The Girl began a blog about American Idol and Alan Iverson and she stopped her writing – although I suppose that has as much to do about the decline of both her subjects. Katrin may or may not have continued since it now takes an invitation to read her blog (how rude!), and even Anna had to end her blog shortly after it began because of the vagaries of politics.
Much has transpired since I began my blog and it seems as though a lifetime has transpired since it went dormant. I reconnected with some old friends through the blog, including the lurking Molly and a few “anonymous” respondents who are perhaps less anonymous to me than they think. But mostly I connected to my past and the things I remember so fondly. It was an honor to write about Bill, not only about his last years, but the years we spent goofing off as kids on Lake Drive and as adults as business partners.
There were so many wonderful events that landed on the Lazlo dime. The Girl graduated, captured so well by the artful eye of a friendly photographer, The Boy and The Ber got hitched, elections happened, screwing with my delicate sense of a reasonable world order, friendships came and went, new people entered my life, and I got to look around for photos of Diane.
The biggest change and probably the most central reason for putting the brakes on the blogging, was with Mrs. Laz. You all know the story so no reason trying to write myself into a happier ending. I always tried to be open with the readers – some would say too open – and it never felt appropriate to continue as though nothing was different. If I blogged about something with an attempt at humor, it would appear to most observers I was being glib about too much, too soon. It was also true I was in too dark of a space to even remember how to write in a humorous tone. If I wrote more openly about what was going on with my head and my heart, it could have left deeper wounds and been, well, insensitive. That left only politics to comment on and, frankly, I didn’t want to write about our dear leader out of fear of ending up on a list that various security forces review on a regular basis.
Despite having a lack of topics to write about, I’ve decided to find a way to post again here and there. I feel a need to get the cobwebs off my creative side and the blog, like an old friend, has just been patiently waiting for me to come visit it again. Good to see you again, Laz….
