Tuesday, July 22, 2008

I Want To Be On Top

I was thinking that the Ol' Lament is in need of a makeover.  Perhaps feeling the need to do this has been motivated in part by being left in the dust by a "competitor's" blog site.  And yes, he wrote something very touching and it meant something to all that know him, but blogging is a tough business (without pay) and I have a bit of a competitive streak in me (in case you haven't noticed).

So I am taking suggestions from my readers about new colors, new features, the kinds of posts you'd like to see more of and posts you'd like to see less of.  Do you want more photos?  More photos of me in a fish net top?  How about new and improved links?  Whatever your comments, let me know so my blog can remain on top of that other guy I won't name whose name begins with Sladed.  

Yes, usually I complain that his blog doesn't get the comments and attention it deserves, but we're in a ratings' war and I need to win!  And, while noting the need for other blogs to get the recognition for putting out good stuff, please check out The Boy's blog and post some comments.  You may not agree with all that he writes about, but he makes you think.  Meanwhile, I am aware The Girl is creating her own blog and I look forward to her first post and will let you know when that occurs.

Finally, I think Lazlo's Lament needs a new name. To be honest, I came up with that name in about 30 seconds and didn't know I would be stuck with it for life or at least for the three years it's be out there.  Has it been three years?  What have I been doing with my life?  So here is an idea for a new name; see what you think:  how about Laz's Blah Blah Blog or just the Blah Blah Blog?  Thoughts and comments?  Let's see if we can get more than 26.  Ha, that would be ironic, wouldn't it?

Wednesday, July 09, 2008

Thinking About Getting Away To NZ Again

It can really be a pain in the ass to pay attention these days. If ignorance is bliss, give me a lobotomy or make me watch hours of MTV programming.

While most of the social and political nausea happens in the U.S., this week’s loony award goes to the British Prime Minister. While Gordon Brown was attending the G-8 Summit, he attempted to shame the world to reduce the "unnecessary demand" for food and called on British families to cut back on their wasteful use of food. A few hours later, he and his G-8 brethren were served 24 different dishes during his first day at the summit. No wonder his approval rating in England is at 17 percent. Hopefully the Brits can still eat their cake.

On this side of the pond, Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid was making me sick by urging Americans to stop using coal and oil. Reid made the following rant in front of television cameras: “Coal makes us sick, oil makes us sick, it’s global warming, it’s ruining our country and ruining our world” and “we’ve got to stop using fossil fuels.” All I can say to the dem’s fearless leader: you first Harry. Turn off your office lights, get out of your chauffeured Towne Car and buy a bicycle and ride to work, turn off your computers, toss out your refrigerator, your microwave, your oven, your television, your Blackberry, your washer and dryer and, especially, shut off your microphone. See how well you live without electricity. Lead by example and maybe we’ll follow. Maybe.

And if we're into this whole leading by example thing, why don't we have wealthy congressional leaders who believe wealthy Americans don't pay enough in taxes start paying more of their own money in taxes? C'mon Senator Kennedy, nothing in the tax code says you can't pay more than you owe. Toss in a few million more for America's downtrodden.

Speaking of global warming, did anyone see China and India flipping the bird to the rest of us on reducing carbon emissions? Back at the G-8 Summit, there was a lot of hand-wringing on global warming between rounds of food tasting (Organic, no doubt). While the most developed countries – Germany, UK, France, the US, among others – were busy surrendering their economies at the altar of climate change, India and China were throwing cold water on limiting greenhouse gases by rejecting the G-8’s curbs on carbon emissions. That’s bad news for the acolytes of global warming, but here’s a good point: if every person living in China and India threw some cold water on anything, wouldn’t that start another Ice Age?

How can the developed world that has spent so much time, money and energy cleaning up its polluted rivers and air (remember LA in the Sixties?) unilaterally give up human progress and allow 25 percent of the earth’s population to pollute full speed ahead? Is it just me or do global warming alarmists just believe climate change happens over the U.S. and other developed countries, sparing the developing world? Do only carbon emissions originating in the developed world shrink the polar caps, or is it possible that something happening in China and India has an impact? Of course, the bigger joke is the polar caps have as much ice today as they did 100 years ago. Doubters can look that up if they want.

Of course the price of oil is grabbing all the headlines these days. What burns my cookies to a crisp is the reason oil prices have gone up didn’t just happen yesterday. If you believe in the mystery of supply and demand, you would note the growing economies of India, China and Southeast Asia and surmise it would have an impact on oil usage. If you were paying attention and really focused, you might notice that oil producing countries are in volatile regions of the world such as the Middle East where even the camels can’t get along. You may even note that our military adventurism might stir up a bit of dust and create uncertainty in the oil markets.

So if all of these things were occurring over the past few decades, where were our elected officials on this? We actually elect these people to pay attention to these kinds of details so we can work the first six months of the year to pay for the government they are supposed to be running. Why didn’t someone in Congress see this coming and have committees created, reports written and solutions promoted? It seems all they did was make sure they had a scapegoat at the ready.

We’re being told now that there is no point in drilling anywhere because new wells won’t produce oil for 7-10 years. Are they trying to tell us we won’t need oil in 7-10 years? What would have happened if Members read the tea leaves better and drilled 7-10 years ago?

The best idea on oil I’ve head lately is from Newt Gringrich, who I am beginning to believe should be running the country right now. Check out his American Solutions website and read what an intelligent leader comes up with when he doesn’t have to please various voting blocs.

One of Newt’s ideas is to sell half of the U.S. Strategic Petroleum Reserve at current market prices. That would dump 350 million barrels of oil on the market at $140 per barrel.

If my calculator can correctly handle numbers this large, a sale of 350 million barrels would bring in the tidy sum of $49 billion. Newt believes this amount of oil suddenly dumped on the market would drop oil prices by $50 per barrel and anger a few sheiks and despots (and to keep the dems happy, cause a few speculators to lose their shirts).

Newt’s idea doesn’t end with a simple sale. Once oil drops down to $90 per barrel, he says buy it all back, rake in the savings and re-fill the petroleum reserve. That would turn a profit of $17.5 billion which could be used to spend on research for alternative energy programs. If the price of oil began to inch up later on, we’d only have to toss out the notion of dumping our reserve on the market again to keep OPEC and others honest. Leave it up to capitalism to find a cure for …. well … capitalism.

But if all this is getting you down, watch this funny parody on the panic over oil.

Wednesday, July 02, 2008

The Best Part Was "Everything"

So the kids got hitched and it was indescribable to see your son getting married – but I will try to describe it anyway.

First, we couldn’t have asked for better weather when you’re standing on the beach at sunset in the midst of the “June Gloom” season. The sun had been obscured by clouds – no Pink Floyd references, Sladed – for perhaps the previous (and subsequent) 10-12 days. But not on June 30. It was perfect; no clouds, a gentle breeze, a bright blue ocean, and a beautiful setting sun. Just perfection for an outdoor, beach wedding. The Boy decided on a high bluff above the beach, which had a wonderful view of the ocean below. It had been a location previously scouted and one the bride and groom thought would be the best place.

The ceremony was attended by just the Ber’s parents, the Mrs. and I and the Girl. The women folk started getting ready at 10 a.m. while the guys got ready about 5:45 p.m. Not sure what this says about the sexes. When the women arrived in the limo driven by Wrong-Way Warren, they all looked like they had been getting ready for the previous nine hours, which is to say they all looked marvelous. The Ber looked beautiful in her sleek wedding dress; the work of many hands, but finished to perfection. The Boy looked dashing in an off-white linen suit and white shirt.

The reverend did a very nice job of keeping the vows simple and fitting the personalities of the bride and groom. Daisy, the photographer, climbed lamp posts, hung off of cliffs and rolled around on the ground to get perfect photos – we think.

The kids did their repeating after the reverend, each parent gave away their child and a good smooch sealed the deal. This was followed by more trapeze work by Daisy for additional photos as the sun set.

After the wedding ceremony and with the two officially married, it was back into the limo with Wrong-Way Warren and off to the Four Seasons Hotel where there was a private room arranged with a private balcony area for Champagne toasting and tasty hors d'oeuvres. The dinner menu was created just for the couple and our group and had their names on it and the words “Just Meant to Be,” the wedding slogan.

The food was incredible, on nobody’s diet and so rich that I think we all groaned when they brought the unlawfully-good tasting wedding cake. Naturally I, along with the others, ate through the pain. While many stomachs yummed through the meal, the conversation was more like a merged family sitting around a big dining room table and was so nice and pleasant. We each had a little to say about the couple, including me after the censors stepped in and had their thumbs on the 7-second button. The dinner couldn’t have been better or more relaxing and it was superbly put together by Ronald the Efficient Austrian following specific orders delivered by the Girl (perhaps the perfect wedding or corporate merger should happen between these two). What seemed simple to us was well planned by the Girl to the desires of the bride and groom. By 10:30 the adorable couple was sent off to a room and spa day at the La Costa Resort and my guess was there was a lot of pay-for-view movie watching (I'm guessing something with Mathew McConaughey and Kate Hudson) and then off to bed.

It was such a great family event and everyone helped to make it a special day for the Boy and the Ber, who now must spell her last name as a matter of course just for marrying into our family. Special kudos goes out to the Girl for taking her Maid Of Honor responsibilities to a professional level and to Alison as part of Team Bride. Of course none of it would have been as great had we not been able to share it with Dan and Jo Jo and me with my lovely bride. As the Ber said when asked what was the best part, simply announced, “Everything.” I couldn’t agree more.